Life in general

My NCLEX is one week from today (that's my nursing state boards for you non-nursing people out there.) Which means that my fingernails are in ruins, my personal hygiene has gone out the window (hello sweat pants!), I've become a nocturnal hermit with a nursing book latched to my hand and my anxiety level is steadily climbing. But it's almost over :)

Nothing is official at work yet, which adds to the stress, but I'm trying not to think about it too much since it's been the boss lady coming to me about a job these last few months so I don't think that's gonna change any time soon. I just have to believe I made it this far and things will work out in the end.

Married life has been fantastic. Granted, being finished with school and on a study-cation has meant that Jim and I have spent more quality time together in the last month than we managed over the last year. But it's been good, I'm relishing sleeping in and crafting and trying to enjoy the tranquility since I know once this test is out of the way I am back in the working world. Jim and I have been keeping around the house and staying low key due to finances but it's been nice spending time with our kitties and big fluffy puppy.

Friends recently had a beautiful little baby girl so whenever I'm in need of relaxing baby time I've got an open invite to come snuggle. They certainly don't seem to mind having "nurse laurel" so excited to help out. I've been on the baby train pretty hard for the past six months or so (btw, congrat's Meg on impending mommyhood!) but know it's not the right time for us so I'll just relish spending time with my friends cute kiddos for now. Hopefully in the next year or so things will change but I am trying to relax and not push things. With turning 27 around the corner I'm hoping to start things off right.

Christmas

The second Christmas without him was easier.

I didn't keep expecting him to come down the hallway wearing his Grinch teeshirt, I didn't try to look over at him so we could share a quick eye roll at someones bad joke, or share a quick laugh at Mom for being scatterbrained about something silly. It wasn't weird that he wasn't sitting in his chair with tea or orange soda, with the house smelling of cigars.

We bagged up the wrapping paper without him telling us to. Mom stocked the stove and walked the dog and carved the roast. The family talked and laughed and ate and no one mentioned him.

The second Christmas was easier.

But I miss him every day.