I finish my first nursing class on Monday (well, mostly.. i have a five minute long evaluation on Tuesday with my clinical instructor but that's it!) I'm hoping I can improve on my last test grade and come out with a strong B. I would have liked to be in the strong A area but after getting an 82 on the last test and an 88 on the first one I'm gonna just go for the B and not add the extra pressure on myself of NEEDING the A. It's been something getting used to nursing school and coming to grips that this scholastic experience is not the same as all my others. I am working three days a week and still coming to grips with some significant life changes. I cannot expect myself to get A's on every test and every paper or project. This does not mean I will be a bad nurse. I'm hoping this means I just come out of nursing school as a sane one!
I'm not going to lock myself in the house and study every moment that I'm not working. I've had a hard enough time making friends in Connecticut and now that I'm getting to know some of my classmates and really enjoying their company I'm going to enjoy it. One of the big things losing my Dad taught me was that you have to do everything to can to enjoy every day as it comes because you never know when your last days will come rolling around. I don't want to just survive the next two years, I want to live them and embrace them. I'm sure they will be a trial but I want to look back on it and smile that I didn't just lock myself in a box and muddle through. I want to LIVE the way my Dad would want me to. I want to meet him again in 60 years and have him walk up to me and say "Daaamn girl, you did great!"
Jim and I went to Boston last Friday for the Jimmy Eat World concert. Even though we just drove though the city for the show and then back out again I felt like Dad was with me the whole time I was there. He lived in Boston when he was younger for a while and I think always wished he could have gotten back there. I fawned all over that city... it was beautiful... even in the rain.
Five months. It feels like a thousand years and yet no time at all. I still wish we had one more day.
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